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When America Locked Us Out

As humans we are susceptible to believe what we are told.  It’s easier than looking into it on our own, spending time thinking about it and coming to our own conclusion.  Reality is as much a creation based on what we have been told than it is based on an absolute reality.  We have to take a lot of things on faith, there is no way that I can conclusively prove, by myself, that tides are due to the moon’s gravity or other such bigger-than-me phenomena.  Our generation has access to more information, more quickly than any that preceded us due to the internet, 24-7 news cycles, and access to higher learning institutions.  What if we didn’t have such sources, what could our reality look like?

If you stood on your national border, who would you see?  From the US you would most likely see Canada or Mexico.  If you were crazy though you might see Russia…  When North Koreans look across their southern border, what do they see?

America!?!

That’s what we were told.  The buildings in the photo above are “American” buildings.  The soldiers standing guard are the “American Army”.  The land in the distance is the American occupied territory of Korea.  The government of South Korea?  That is a puppet government, ready to fall, according to this North Korean newspaper:

OK, let’s be honest.  There is definitely an American military presence in South Korea.  We are currently occupying certain countries.  We have and do support non-democratic regimes throughout the world.  We certainly have had puppet governments put in place.  BUT, South Korea is actually an independent country; a quite successful country.  We are not occupying it and enslaving them.  Utilizing their free will, ingenuity and hard-work, they make some of the world’s best electronics and affordable cars.  The United States of America, to my knowledge, is not occupying, governing or controlling South Korea.

Then the news came from the “line”, we would not be able to enter the buildings that cross the border.  These buildings were built for meetings between the two countries where you could stand in both North and South Korea at once.  We would not be able to do this very touristy act because, “the Americans locked the door.”  This was a literal international incident, here we were, standing in North Korea, feeling the American oppression first-hand.

Our North Korean “General” spoke solemnly of the occasion, that this was not their fault, it was America’s.  It was roughly 9:30 AM Pyongyang Standard Time, 8:30 PM Washington Time.  Here’s what we think happened.  Around 8 PM in Washington DC, Barack Obama knew now was the time to turn the screws on Kim Jong Il, picked up his red phone and made the order, “lock the door”.  Within seconds, interrupting his game of Angry Birds, he received an email with a link in it that read, “we recently received a request from you to lock the door on the North Korean border, to confirm this request please click on this link.”  Understanding he was going to create a diplomatic row, maybe start a war, he clicked the link.  After releasing a despotic cackle, he returned to his game of Angry Birds.

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Comments

» Bka :
Sep 26, 2011

That’s the sarcastic/ cynicism I have been waiting for……here I thought the chicken and beer had mellowed you out and was preparing you for an international diplomatic future……..peace………bka

» Phil :
Oct 3, 2011

Those are not US Soldiers circled in your picture. Those soldiers are from South Korea. The US Military does not, as a matter of course stand guard in the Panmonjum Truce Village.

I think you say that tongue in cheek but most Americans don’t realize just how miniscule the presence of the US Military is in South Korea. 28,500 by treaty at last count.

» thinkCHUA :
Oct 4, 2011

Phil, I was trying to tell the story from the propagandized North Korean view. I don’t think any of the westerners believed that they were US soldiers, that South Korea is occupied by the US, or much of the military claims by the DPRK tour guides.

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About the Author

thinkCHUA: is an explorer seeking to understand the world's places and people. Currently on a multi-year expedition across Asia and Oceania with my wife, LOCAVORista, we are exploring the places to go, things to do, and uncovering business opportunities.

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